General Conference & How I Came To Be.

My parents are 17 years apart.  Mom was 21 they got married and dad was 39.  They have 5 kids right away and really close together too.  The cord was wrapped around Cindy's neck and there was worries.  Everything turned out just fine though, but they decided to stop with 5 kids.

Fast forward 9 years to April 1971.  It's General Conference time and dad is in Priesthood session.  The prophet is Joseph Fielding Smith.

Joseph Fielding Smith 

He gives a talk entitled: Our Responsibilities As Priesthood Holders.

"I call upon the Church and all it's members to forsake the evils of the world.  We must shun unchastity  and every form of immorality as we would a plague.  We must not dam up the wellsprings of life by preventing childbirth.  We must not be guilty of unrighteous and evil acts of abortion."

The underlined sentence is what pricks my fathers heart goes home and as I like to say had a little "talk" with mom. One year and four months latter Rebecca Lynn enters the world.  18 months latter my sister Sarah comes.  

In recent years I've realized that I owe my life to: 

1. A prophet of God. 

2. My father being in the right place at the right time. 

3. My father listening to the words of the prophet and ACTING. 

4. My Mom (last, but not least!) 

Not only do I owe my life to these things but so does Sarah and her 5 kids.  I'm sure Blake (Sarah's husband) is appreciative. 

My testimony is that General Conference is important and may alter your life in significant ways.  

Anger, General Conference and The Book of Mormon

I have been single for a long time.  All I wanted was a temple marriage and children.  I became an aunt at the age of 7 and literally half of my siblings were married by the time I was in the 5th grade.  I babysat my life away as a teenager.  One year I made a thousand dollars. But I was insecure and so unsure especially when it came to  boys.  I clammed up and ran away even in college when I would get asked out.

But as the years went on my desire for a family was still holding strong, but my patience  waned.   I became angry, bitter and mad at young pretty girls who got the guys because of their looks, even though they were scripturally stupid.  I realized that although they were doctrinally dumb they were sweet and kind and grouchy people didn't get into the celestial kingdom.   "I signed up for this?" I  often thought. The anger and bitterness continued becoming stronger and stronger, especially after the babies of those friends of mine came. One of my favorite things to say was "They have a house, 2 to 5 kids, a time share in Cancun, and a dog, but I don't even have a dog!"   I didn't understand why I was still single.  I wasn't that ugly.  I had righteous desires.  I had lived a good life. I had served a mission, and had spent my time  preparing myself by collecting every thing I got into a folder about dating and marriage.  I was ready, I thought.  I wanted it, but didn't know how to be in a relationship.

 The negative emotions continued to grow.  It didn't serve me well.  Men don't like angry bitter women!

I felt that it was so unjust, so unloving, so unkind of Heavenly  Father to not let me have this righteous desire.   

I love America and see the need for war.  My father fought  in WWII, my brother and brother in law were in the army and when the world is full of injustice WE FIGHT. Take for example the America Revolution.  When we were not treated well, we went to war.  Had we not done that, there would be no USA and we'd be  ruled by the British. That's what I was doing- fighting!  Against who?  God. As if I could beat him in an arm wrestle, let alone anything else!

I was justified in my anger and bitterness!   I was thinking these things one General Conference morning as I was in the kitchen but still listening to the TV in the living room.  Elder James E. Faust was talking.  He was speaking of the Savior.  I don't remember what talk or what he said, but the spirit brought to my remembrance the submissiveness of Jesus.   I started to cry and I knew that I needed to be submissive to the will of the Father for me.  I needed to let go of the anger, resentment of other girls getting married and the bitterness of me being overlooked (The thing that kills me now is that I wasn't over looked.  I over looked them!).

While my attitude didn't change automatically it was another step in getting my heart right.  It would still be years when I would come to completely  trust and rely on and believe the Saviors promises to me that were given in my patriarchal blessing and 17 other blessing that said essentially the same thing:  A young man will come into my life..... 

I continued to read the scriptures daily and marked the qualities and attributes of the Father and the Son that I found.  As I read year in and year out, marking those verses with the same color so they stood out to me, my faith grew stronger and stronger in the promises the Lord had made to me in the scriptures as well as my blessings.  Here is an example of a few verses:  

Hebrews  11:13 These all died in faith, not have received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth.  

Hebrews 12: 1 Wherefore seeing we are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.

2 Nephi 29:5 ... I the Lord have not forgotten my people. 

vs.9 ... I do this that I may prove unto many that I am the same, yesterday, today and forever ...

2 Nephi 31: 15... the words of my Beloved are true and faithful...

2Nephi 33:3 ... He will hear my cry

Jacob 2: 31 .... I, the Lord, have seen the sorrow, and heard the mourning of the daughters of my people...

Jacob 3:1... He will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause, and send down justice upon those who seek your destruction. 

Jacob 4:13.. the spirit speaketh the truth and lieth not.  Wherefore, it speaketh of things as they really are, and of things as they really will be.

Jacob 6:4 ...how merciful is our God unto us...

2 Nephi 26:24 He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world. 

vs. 33...he doeth that which is good among the children of men..

Mosiah 8:20 O how marvelous are the works of the Lord, and how long doeth he suffer with his people.

And so the struggle continues.  But I believe the words of the prophets and the words of the scriptures.  I don't throw tantrums anymore, I just submit, sometimes happily and sometimes with tears, and I suppress my grouchiness, but I am always faithful to what I know is true.

See here for the article I wrote that was published in the New Era about getting my patriarchal blessing.

I'm Here!

I'm here in Nampa Idaho. Things are mostly set up in my place. I've been lost quite a bit here. I've sent some resumes in for jobs. That is what I need the most. My family has been great. I've seen someone everyday so far out of help or necessity.

About 12 people-men, one teenage girl and one little primary boy helped unload the U-Haul in 1/2 hour! The bishop and elders quorum pres was in the bunch. Mike set up my bed so I had a place to lay my head and the next morning was church. I got ready to go a mid much emotion, and got turned around and finally found the church which should of taken me 5 min to get there. I was 45 min late, but caught most of the last speaker. Every one was SO nice, introducing themselves. The building is 2 stories with lots of stairs and a strange lay out! We won't be long as some re-modeling will be taking place soon. There is no elevator! The ward is large- out to the gym with chairs. Lots of babies and children but lots of older people too. The RS president came and talked to me. I got a call yesterday from someone who gave me help with finding a job. This ward should be a blessing.

The dogs are doing GREAT. The last 2 nights, Parker instigated playing, which they haven't done for months. They have a fenced in yard of wood, so Coco can't see out and bark at people or other animals. Of course Parker found where he can get out, but mike fixed that yesterday after he mowed my sad excuse for a lawn. It's nice to be able to leave them outside when I'll be gone for hours. The entry way is covered so they will have shelter in what ever weather comes. And the best of all news is they are not sleeping with me, as they did before.

My mail man is LDS. He ran into Mark and Holly on Monday when they came to help. Mark is my brother, who just turned 50. He thought that Mark was my dad! No, he's my brother and I'm heading on 40. Ok- I'll be 39 in a few months, but close enough!

The tears have lessened considerably and often I am happy, but it doesn't seem to last all day. Sadness creeps in till it's pretty obvious. But tomorrow is another day and soon I won't have a list of things to do just to survive, I won't get lost, I'll have a job and friends too!

Yes, men and women who turn their lives over to God will find out that he can make a lot more out of their lives than they can. He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace. Whoever will lose his life to God will find he has eternal life. - Ezra Taft Bensen

Encouraging respect for religious diversity

Let us as latter-day Saints reach out to others not of our faith. Let us never act in a spirit of arrogance or with a holier-than-thou attitude. Rather, may we show love and respect and helpfulness toward them. We are greatly misunderstood, and I fear that much of it is of our own making. We can mbe more tolerant, more neighborly, more friendly, more of an expample than we have been in the past. Let us teach our children to treat others with friendship, respect, love and admiration. That will yeild a far better result than will an at titude of egotism and arrogance.

April 2000 President Gordon B. Hinckley

Following the Prophet

1. Will require Sacrifice
2. Will require me to change
3. May be unpopular
4. May mean not knowing "why"
5. Will require my service
6. Will require the little things as well as the dramatic ones
7. Will require me to stand as a witness at all times and in all places

The Gospel Restored

Prophetic Words

Women