healing a wounded soul.

I love the last 5 or so chapters of 2 Nephi. Many times when I've read those chapters I've fallen in love with Nephi and have felt that in the pre-mortal life I followed him around and listened to his words. The chapters are wonderful and full of doctrine.

I've tried to read my scriptures every day since I was 16 (I'm 39), but recently life has been so hectic that I actually thought of giving it up and only reading on Sundays. There are so many members who don't make the scriptures a life long pursuit and I've wondered how they can do that. The scriptures are such a boon to me. I don't know what I'd do with out them. I've had as prophets have said 'a love affair' with them'.

Last night I started to read Jacob ch 2. I read 1 verse and I felt the need, the impression I guess to pray. A scripture came to my mind- the scriptures will tell you all things what ye should do. I didn't think I'd find any mind blowing answers in this chapter, but maybe as I kept reading ideas and help would come. I know people have counseled to pray before you read so you have help to understand, but I've never found that to work for me. In fact it does the exact opposite.. I get more, much more by just reading and studying what comes to me. But I prayed. I prayed for the things I need, am fasting for.

Jacob ch 2 is about pride, plural wives and hearing the pleasing word or God vs. a call to repentance. Many things caught my attention. The pleasing word of God which healeth the wounded soul. I automatically thought of my experiences with my present bishop and my previous one. I went to have my soul healed. One time it happened and one time I heard nothing of the sort. With my life experiences the last 2 years that is what I needed, not a call to repentance. I got the pleasing word of God from Bishop Mix. He didn't read me any verses, but I heard the voice of the Lord through him. Again I'm thankful for that knowledge of what the word of God via the scriptures and a bishop can do for a person.

Then I came to the verses about seeking first the Kingdom of God verses riches. I love what it says about being in the phase of seeking for riches what you're suppose to seek them for- OTHERS, not yourself. I put a box around vs. 17, but studied the many foot notes of vs 18.

17 Think of your ^abrethren like unto yourselves, and be familiar with all and free with your ^bsubstance, that ^cthey may be rich like unto you.

18 But ^abefore ye seek for ^briches, seek ye for the ^ckingdom of God.

I'm in a terrible financial mess. I can't pay all my bills and need to make about 600 more a month. The non-profit credit counselor told me I should consider bankruptcy. Never in my life would I ever NEED to do that if I had not married. Never in my life would I ever consider that. I'm looking for a roommate to help a little.

Funny how the messages in that chapter were the things I'm dealing with. The scriptures have the answers.