Dad is still around

My father's birthday is Feb 26th.  He was born in 1917, so he would be 96 this year. I've posted before about moments with my dad on the other side of the veil.  I've had quite a few recently.

A few weeks ago I had that upset week due to what was said to me by the bishop in front of the whole ward council.  I spent sacrament meeting REALLY upset.  In my tears, all of a sudden I thought of dad.  I missed my dad.  I wish my dad was here.  I KNOW he would of felt my pain, he would of understood and not wanted me to suffer in that way.  I know this because of how he acted in the past to things like this that caused me such grief and heart ache.  He would of cried with me. I know he was there, listening to me, hearing me, totally aware of what I was going through. I know I thought of him only, because he was there, watching or actually with me.

I felt nothing from him when I got married.  Nothing.  I know it's because it wasn't right.  And that is sad.

I went to the temple Thursday and the high priest group leader was there.  He was one of the people who also was in the bishopric's office when "it" happened.  He asked me to go to the prayer circle. His wife is not a member.  When I was there, standing next to this thin older brother I thought of dad.  *tears*  I miss my dad.

Dad and Mom, just a month before he died in July of 2006.

This didn't happen recently, but while I lived in Nampa, praying on my bedside crying so hard, I saw in my minds eye, someone tapping dad on the shoulder while he was talking to a group of people, men I think.  The person tapped him and then pointed down at me.  He turned around and witnessed my pain.  I'd like to think the person who tapped him was the Savior, but it's my understanding that he does not reside there.  Either way, it does not matter.  My dad was there and someone, perhaps another family member let my dad know what was going on with me. He seems to be there in times of pain.

I really believe that dad is doing missionary work there.  He was almost always called to be a stake missionary.  He was often trying to be a missionary while on this earth- in his younger years at least. 

It was sad to be in Europe 6 days after we buried him.  I went to WWII places. I finally KNEW what kind of questions to ask and he wasn't there. 

A thought just occurred to me.  I think he is very aware of his family when we are in pain.  When we are happy and things are going good for us spiritually and emotionally (those 2 are tied together) he's busy doing his job. I know that he's busy but aware because a blessing told me so.  I think if I had a spouse that I was sealed to that was on the other side of the veil he would be the one looking in.  I'm sure dad is worried about the married kids when there are hard times, but if they have a spouse who takes good care of them emotionally, is at least trying anyway, then his fatherly responsibility... is well.... It's been taken over by the husband responsibility, because you know... A man should leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife.

So the big message is:

Of this I know! 

It's not about the places

On Sunday our lesson in Relief Society was about the first vision and Joseph Smith.  The teacher asked about our testimonies of the first vision and how we got them.  Anyone who shared talked about the places of church history like; the sacred grove, Nauvoo, Carthage jail,  Kirtand and such.  While the first speaker mentioned her visit to the grove and how she felt nothing.  Another woman said if you sing you can feel it.  When I was there at the sacred grove it was a beautiful group of trees, but to feel the spirit I sang: Oh, How lovely was the morning.

A sister said the same thing that it might not happen there at the exact place.  That was the place for Joseph, not necessarily for us.  The stories continued of places.  I wanted to share about reading The Teaching of the Prophet Joseph Smith.  That book never fails to increase my testimony of  the man who delivered  to us the good news of the pure gospel.

I've been to Israel, Book of Mormon lands in Mexico and Belize, and I've been to almost all of the church history sights and they were all great travel experiences.  I have pictures in my mind, I have pictures that I took, but that is not where I got my  testimony.  A Testimony comes through the Holy Ghost alone.  You don't have to go to the places to get a testimony.

On my mission I loved to testify of The Book of Mormon, but sharing the first vision could be difficult.  It is such a fantastic story, but it had to have happen, because of what we have through Joseph Smith; the books, the doctrines, the truths.  That is the real miracle, the miracle of what proceeded the first vision.  If you know of, understand, and love the doctrines he taught, then of course one can with confidence say Joseph Smith saw God the Father and his Son Jesus Christ.  As I write this, I realize to have the strength to endure what he did, he had to have a manifestation like that, a manifestation that could not be denied, that is the foundation for all other visions, dreams, and angels to come.  It's one thing to say and angle came and brought you gold plates (which you didn't melt down to save your family from poverty), but translated it to a book that now covers the earth, but quite another to say "I saw them!"    I suppose any man could say, an angel came with a book and I translated it, but gosh, I don't have the gold anymore.  Who  would come up with such a fantastic story?  I wrote a book- sure,  I found gold- sure,  I saw angels- OK, but the god head as 2 people, an idea that was just not entered into at the time.   It had to have happened.  I had to!  I know it did because of the fruits of what followed afterwords.

"What is the greatest testimony any man or woman can have as to this being the work of God? I will tell you what is the greatest testimony I have ever had, the most sure testimony, that is the testimony of the Holy Ghost, the testimony of the Father and the Son."

Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Wilford Woodruff [2004], 48

  'The brethren who came to preach the Gospel to me, I could easily out-talk them . . .; but their testimony was like fire in my bones; I understood the spirit of their preaching; I received that spirit; it was light, intelligence, power, and truth, and it bore witness to my spirit, and that was enough for me' (Remarks by Brigham Young, 28 July 1861; JD 9:141)."