Halloween Weekend

A little blurry- but you can see that Grace is an elephant, Caleb is Frankeinstien, Spencer is bat, Ryan is Hobbs, and Emily is a bee. Maggie the Bassett hound is a butterfly.

It's always fun to the with kids on Halloween. I like the way Sarah handles the candy. It all goes into one big bowl and we all share with 100 % control by the adults. None of that "that's mine" and someone eating theirs all up first and then being mad that someone else has a lot left.

Perkins Family Pumpkins

Jason and I drove down to Vancouver WA for the Halloween Weekend so he could meet some family. My sister Sarah and her family live there and my brother Karl lives in Hillsboro OR. I wanted to see the kids in their costumes and Jason wanted to go to Mulitnomah Falls together. Here are some pic's of the weekend.

I was putting on Graces diaper for bed the first night and Grace proceeded to tell me that Me, Mommy and Daddy were all nice and wiped her bottom, but Jason was mean. She had not interacted with him yet at all.

In church on Sunday Grace sat right in his lap and started playing with him. She was pulling his tie and such and it was getting a little crazy so he tried to get her to stop by play bitting her like a bear. She said "Don't eat Becky, Don't eat Becky!"

After church we had the 3 youngest climbed up all around and on us. It was pretty fun.

Jason is great with kids.

Bainbridge or Bremerton?

Seattle is to the right of this map. The dotted lines are the ferry routes. Find Bremerton- through a straight and then go North. You'll find Bainbridge.

Jason and I went on a day trip to the Islands. Jason had never been on a ferry. We decided to go and find our honey moon cabin that we will stay in for 2 nights after the wedding and reception Friday night. I think that was a good idea. We don't want to get lost on the way there. We'll be anxious to get there. :) I'm the one that booked the place and I usually travel on the Bremerton Ferry headed to Bremerton as it's a short ride and my friend Rebecca lives there. It's also where the Navel Base is. We drove on the Bremerton Ferry and drove off about an hour latter, drove up the mail street, got a map at the gas station and then tried to find this cabin on he water. We called the lady who owns the place and she told us directions. None of them matched! I couldn't find anything that looked the same. It was then that I realized we were on the WRONG ISLAND! We were suppose to go to Bainbride Island, not Bremerton. Luckily Rebecca was at home and she gave us driving directions to get there. The great thing was Jason did not get upset at all. Not an i-o-ta! We found the little place by driving where we will spend the first 2 days of our married life. It's cute. Can't wait!

I'd never been to the expensive high class town of Eagledale with cute shops on Bainbridge. Bremerton is not like that at all. Jason wants to live there and he thinks he's ok with the commute. I'm not ok with the commute or the housing prices there!

Jason A Mason

I'm getting married in November to Jason Alan Mason. Jason is a brick mason and construction guy. He has blue eyes, is almost 6 feet tall, is buff and the kindest, gentlest, loving man I've ever met.

The old High Counselor that I worked with in the single adult program emailed me about him. He's a new convert and needs friends, he said. I asked if he was 'normal'. He is and very good looking too! We talked on the phone a few times before meeting in public at the single adult Ensign Ranch Family Camp out Labor day weekend. Our eyes connected and stopped us both in our tracks as I walked around the parameter. I shook it off as and told myself I didn't know him.

Later he came up to me and said "I know you. You're Becky". I was speechless and didn't know what to say. We danced a few times. I was able to introduce him to my sister and brother who were also there and he gave me a side hug that night.

After that he proceeded to chase me, calling me on my way home from the camp out. We didn't go out till the next sat after stake conference. He took me to The Cheese Cake Factory one of his favorite places. We talked about marriage, babies, how we wanted our life, etc. It was weird for a first date. I thought he was going to try to kiss me and I wasn't going to let him.

The second weekend after meeting him, both of us went to Astoria Oregon for a SA conference. We went in separate cars, but spent most of our time together. It was there that he held my hand for the first time as we walked on the beach.

I had concerns at first about how long he'd been a member- just a few months and that he'd been married a couple times. But with one prayer asking what I should feel and what I should do, peace came over me and I then I asked him about his past, he sat me down and told me. It was then that I wanted to kiss him and it seems like we haven't stopped since. I no longer have any reservations at all. I trust him completely.

I told him I hadn't been kissed for a LONG time and that I didn't remember how. I was right! For 2 weeks he kissed me while I was a bad kisser, but I finally got the hang of it.

One of our best dates was a motorcycle ride up to Snoqualmie Falls, dinner at a Mexican restaurant, and then 3rd row tickets, right in the middle of the theater for Wicked! It was so awesome. I was so excited for days before and days after! It was just great and he did a lot of work to get those tickets on such late notice. I was so happy that he did such a nice thing for me. We went to Alki Beach in West Seattle afterwords.

I found out later that Jason had thought that a friend would introduce him to his next 'girl'. He also prayed for a girl with short blond hair, brown eyes, athletic build, and small breasts! His prayers were answered! In a lot of ways Jason is just what I need in a man. While he doesn't have all the usual things on the list, like being an RM, knowing the scriptures, etc, he is what I need and he will get a knowledge of the scriptures and everything else that goes with that.

Jason has 2 kids. Megan is 21 and Ben is 17. They both live with their mom in Illinois.

We will be starting our life together on Nov 20th 2009!

My Heritage

Our Heritage: A Brief History of

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

From Chapter 7 page 86:

"For those who joined the Church outside the United States,
this was a time for gathering to Zion, which meant traveling by
boat to America. Elizabeth and Charles Wood sailed in 1860 from
South Africa, where they had labored several years to acquire
money for their travel. Elizabeth kept house for a wealthy man,
and her husband made bricks until they obtained the needed
funds. Elizabeth was carried aboard the ship on a bed 24 hours
after delivering a son and was given the captain’s berth so she
could be more comfortable. She was very ill during the journey,
almost dying twice, but lived to settle in Fillmore, Utah".

This is the story of my great great grandparents! Only they have a name wrong. It's not Elizabeth Wood, but Ann Day Wood. Elizabeth is her sister. Charles and Ann Wood met in London, married June 11, 1848, sailed to South Africa a year later and were among the first converts in 1853 from that part of the world. The second time she was thought to be dead on the ship to America, she was prepared for burial at sea. Her brother Richard stepped up and and said he did not think she was dead. He related a dream which he had before leaving Cape Town, South Africa in which he was the only one who did not get to Utah. The people stepped back while the elders administered to her, after which she began to breath and finally recover. They spent 73 days at sea on the ship "Alacrity" and because they came from Africa, a large crowd gathered at the pier in Boston curious to see colored people. They were disapointed. They arrived at Winter Quarters in the middle of July in 1860 and six months after making the trip from Africa they made it to Salt Lake City. True to the dream of Richard Day, all except him arrived in Utah. My great Grandma was born in zion in 1871, who is the mother of my grandfather, my mom's dad.

I'm proud of my pioneer heritage.

Grace

"You've likely been asked if you've been

SAVED by grace.

But, has anyone ever asked you if you've been

CHANGED by grace?"

Brad Wilcox

The Gospel Restored

The Traveling Family!

At Ensign Ranch while floating the Yakima River, (class 1.5) while it was raining, I asked my boat people about their seminary experiences as I started teaching just days latter. We had been singing the theme songs to TV shows in the 70's and 80's. I started to sing about The Book of Mormon, making it up as I went. While I didn't remember the original words out there, I started to create verses on Friday while driving around dogs. Here's what I came up with.

This is sung to the theme of The Adams Family.

There’s Lehi and Sariah,
And Laman and Lemeul
And Sam and Nephi,
The traveling family

Lehi had a vision
And so he left the city
And all his gold and riches
And lived inside a tent.

But they forgot the plates
So all the boys went back
But Laban wouldn’t share
So Nephi cut his head off.

Sariah wanted grandkids
So all the boys went back
To get the cute girl
And never did complain

One day outside the tent
While they were in the desert
Lehi found a ball
Of curious workmanship.

If worked if they were righteous
And stopped when they were bad.
The ball was like a compass
And our 4 standard works

Laman and Lemuel were whiners
But Sam and Nephi were good
They kept the commandments
And did just what they should.

They walked around for 8 years
Until they saw the ocean
Then Nephi built a big ship
To get to the Promised Land

The Promised Land was pretty
But Lehi died soon after
So Nephi became the leader
Of all the cool good kids.

Laman and Lemuel were wicked
They tried to kill Nephi
Cause he was their younger brother
And ruled over them.

Their plan was unsuccessful
Cause Jesus preserves his people
By warning them of danger
If they follow him.

Written by Rebecca L. Rose

Sept 2009

The Power of Words

Make It Happen!

Love is something you make happen.
Sheri Johnson

Prophetic Words

Forever Strong

Alpine Loop

Me at Sundance Utah Aug 2, 2009

Bridal Veil Falls

Love the aspen trees!

Mount Timpanogus

Black Eyed Susan's

What is your conversion story?

What is your conversion story?
Have you thought deeply about your own journey of faith?
What do you believe, and why do you believe it?
If you have not yet begun this journey, what are you waiting for?
If you are not turning to the will of God, what are you turning to instead?
If you are not seeking to live eternally with Heavenly Father and your families, what are you seeking instead?

As we account for our days, it really is true that some things are simply more important than others.

-Stephanie Smith, CIA Executive, recent convert to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Women

Blast From The Past.

Melanie Klann, Ann Wilkin's, Paige Walker, Aimee Klann, Annette Bowen, Tali Thompson, Cherelyn Linde, Linda Pope, Julie and Jenni Wirrick, Amy McOmber, Me, Tiffany Linde

Me, Rachel and Paige

Me, Leslie Humphrey with daughter Hannah, Janea in the back with Brynlee, Rachel Robey, Paige Walker Morrill, Tali Thompson Laundry.

July 14th, 2009
YW afternoon mini-reunion.
Not pictured: Ann Braithwaite (leader) Kathy Dixon, Cami, Alex, Karen Snow, Traci Campbell, Sarah Rose, Jodi Wirrick, Audra and Nikki Ross, Jenny Hammon, Rochelle Thompson.

Leslie, Melanie, Amy and Cindy Gustin, were a few years younger. Amy Arenson was in the neighboring ward, and Linda and Annette were leaders.

Rachel, Melanie and I were the only one with out kids.
I was the only one never married.
Tiffany only single mom.
Ann=4 kids.
Paige=2 kids
Aimee=3 kids
Tali=4 kids
Cherelyn=3 kids
Julie=5 kids
Jenni=4 kids
Amy=4 kids
Tiffany=1
Divorced=Tiffany and Rachel

Those not pictured
Kathy =3 kids
Cami=4 kids
Alex=1 kid
Karen=0
Tracy= 3 I think
Sarah=5 kids
Jodi= 4 kids
Audra=0
Nikki=4 kids
Jenny=1
Rochelle=4 kids
Divorced=Kathy, Audra
Total inactive= 5
Returned Missionaries=5

Maybe Not

A few maybe not's have happened recently. They are:

1. I may not be teaching the juniors and seniors in seminary.
2. Being a zoo keeper is not looking good. The competition is fierce and I don't have any degrees in biology.
3. While I had a fun time at the mid-singles conference, doesn't look like any dates will come of it. I can look around at the men I know and say "nope, not him. Won't be marring him." to at least 10 of them.

But I'm not panicked. I will just keep on keeping on and see what comes about. I did however make some good girl friends, and got a lot of compliments on my hair, how cute I am and 2 compliments from men on what a good person I am and that they feel the spirit around me. Makes me want to be better!

Early Morning's Here I Come!

Yesterday I was extended the calling of early morning seminary teacher. Luckily I only teach 2 days a week, as I'm a team teacher with Becky Thompson. 2 Becky's, 2 days' each. The kids have Wed morning's off. Were studying The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. I'll be teaching juniors and seniors, which I'm thankful for as they have more to say.

I've already created a shelf of my BOM books to help me, but I can only use church approved curriculum: the teachers seminary guide, the institute manuel and the Ensign. I'll start reading and rereading some of those books. It's been near a year since I have finished the BOM for the umpteenth time. I was so looking forward to studing the Old Testament in Sunday School, but I'll need all week to prepare lessons. I can't image the time it takes to prepare for 5 days!

My oldest sister Beth has taught years of seminary and my brother Mark has also taught. I'm learning that friends Kathy and Marci have taught for 3 years and I already knew that Rebecca and Rohan taught as well.

It will be interesting to see how my schedule creates itself. These are the things I have to do:

• Seminary
• Work 2:30 to 9:00 pm
• Run my dog walking business
• Volunteer at the zoo or the humane society. I'm not so sure I can do both.

I'm glad I'll be getting released from my other callings of Stake SA secretary and ward SA rep.
I'm not sure how they will get along with out me. I'm really the back bone of these programs, but am also a little burned out. I know I'm also going to have to let go of my internet time. Facebook and blog reading has been taking up a lot of my life.

I really want to do a good job and get these kids in the scriptures the way that Brother Thompson (not Becky Thompson's husband) did. I also have ideas for bullitin boards that are not being used.

But most important I've got to in a better sleep schedule. I've been going to bed past 1 am lately, that won't work with everything else. Here's to teenagers, early mornings and the scriptures!

"In the history of the Church there is no better illustration of the prophetic preparation of this people than the beginnings of the seminary and institute program. These programs were started when they were nice but were not critically needed. They were granted a season to flourish and to grow into a bulwark for the Church. They now become a godsend for the salvation of modern Israel in a most challenging hour. We are now encircled. Our youth are in desperate jeopardy. These are the last days, foreseen by prophets in ancient times”

-Boyd K. Packer, "Teach the Scriptures", address to CES religious educators, Oct. 14, 1977

Receiving Me, Receiving You.

I bought this talk CD by a single Latter-day Saint. The talk is called For Single Saints. It's well done with stories and advice from prophets. She has this list of 10 things that Spencer W. Kimball did to receive the revelation on all worthy men receiving the priesthood. One lessen is to pray for someone who will receive you. A sister prayed that prayer and was told that 2 years previous there was someone who wanted her, but who she didn't want. She knew who it was. He was boring! She was not happy about it, but she followed the spirit and called this man and now they are married. Now she thinks he's the smartest guy. Everyone else who knows him still thinks he's boring.

Here's my dilemma: I have plenty of men that would receive me, but I don't want them! They are either too smart and weird or lack social skills, or they are too dumb. Really, they are. I know you have to be physically attracted to them. So what do I do? Pray that I can be attracted to them? Settle? I need a connection! Advice and thoughts are welcome.

I want to be a ZOO KEEPER!

I can't believe I haven't blogged about this.

On July 4th mom, Ruth and I went to the Seattle Zoo called Woodland Park. It cost us $16 dollars to get it! Ruth reminded mom that no, it wasn't 3 tickets for adults, but 2 and 1 senior citizen. The counter guy said: "well actually you have to be 65!" We laughed and mom told him that she was 75! Mom's a young looking chick.

The reason we went was to see the new penguin exhibit. It has been closed for a few years. The exhibit was great. They did an amazing job on it and I got to talk to the keeper and watch him scratch one 'single' penguin. Penguins mate for life and there is always a few single ones- just like in society. If a single penguin gets to close to a couple penguin one of them gets mad and shews them off. Human's could take a lesson from them possibly save those marriages that are torn apart by cheating.



But the really great news is that I got to hand feed giraffe's. It cost 5 bucks and mom flipped for it. It was so worth it. This giraffe got right in my face and breathed on me. It was smelly! Although the zoo keeper kept warning us to not touch them as he didn't know what could happen, I did touch him. Matt (zoo keeper) said that one time a giraffe in turning his long neck and head knocked into a zoo visitor. That doesn't have anything to do with petting them, but we got the idea. I'm sure it's just a liability thing. I got lots of close up pictures of Mr. Giraffe. But anyway, here's the exciting part...



I talked for Matt about how he became a keeper and if he majored in zoology. No he did not, but something close enough, although I don't remember what. Turns out all you have to do is volunteer for 1 to 2 years, if they like you they will hire you to be an associate, then after 2 years they would hire you as a zoo keeper! Of course you'd have to prove that you really want it, that your good and have them like you. You also have to be willing to move around with in the USA. Matt has worked at 4 different zoo's around the country and has worked with different animals.

I walked away so ecstatic. The 5 dollars was so worth it and I felt like my life plan was taking shape. I for sure have decided to leave care giving and was considering becoming a vet assistant, which paid some what more than I am making. I knew I'd work with animals, I just didn't know when or how it would happen. I already scheduled myself to go to a training to volunteer at the Humane Society just a mile from my home, to help me get more experience. Then this zoo possibility pops up and feels so right. Another woman suggested I get on line and told me who the volunteer head person was. I did just that and found out that the last volunteer mtg till Feb on next year is July 25th! Is that perfect timing or what. I had been feeling this drive to go to the zoo and soon and now I know why. Although the 25th is the Mid-Single adult conference, I will be at this meeting that could change my life. I feel like a way is opening up! A zoo keeper makes 44 thou a year. That is enough for a single person and I love to travel, so I'm OK with moving. I know I wouldn't be bored and I sure would feel good about myself and that I had a career and really was somebody, did something besides glorified babysitting.

My Testimony

The gospel is everything to me. It's everything I am. It’s how I define myself. As I read the scriptures every night, the pain of my day is swept away. I’m sure of its truthfulness. As in times past the Lord has chosen prophets to lead his work on the earth. Today the prophet is Thomas S. Monson, but it was Joseph Smith who was first called in this time, this dispensation to RESTORE the truth. The reformation was not enough. Confusion still reigned. When I think of the knowledge that Joseph Smith brought back to the world I cannot give it up. I cannot give up that I will see my father who has passed on again. I cannot give up eternal marriage, baptism’s for the dead, revelation, priesthood authority not only in the church but in my home, and especially The Book of Mormon. Every time I read that book the Spirit tells me it is true, the doctrine is true, the people who lived it are real. There is greater joy and peace and knowledge to be had not only in this life, but in the next. Of this I know and bear witness of.

Heaven-Rescued Land!

Making an American Flag

My sister worked for a company that makes American Flags, Red Cross Flags and some others. With it being near the birthday of our nation I thought I 'd share these pictures.

I have more, but they are slow to get on the blog and the computer. Happy Independence Day!

I'm doing it!

An up date on my beauty challenge to myself.
I'm doing it!
I'm putting on makeup and curling my hair 5 out of 7 days!
Not bad huh!
I do feel better!

Happy Fathers Day Dad!

My dad has been gone for almost 3 years. I wish he was here right now, only younger with some advice for me. But lets face it, his advice was always "get married". Gee, wish I could just to easily do that for him and for me. But regardless, here is a great video about a great dad.

More insight

First of all, I'm writing this because it's been so therapeutic for me and has let me really understand myself and to put a finger right on it. I hope you don't mind me getting personal.

Last night as I was heading to bed I also realized that another reason I was struggling is because I know I'm going to leave my field of care giving. I'm burned out after 11 years and need a change. I'm the poorest I've ever been this year. I'm worried about being stuck here with my mom being poor the rest of my life. Sometimes I see no real out unless I get married.

I want to be a veterinarian assistant. It pays more, but it's not a good time to change jobs and loose benefits which I need so badly due to the medicine I'm on. There is fear with this change and a few ways I could do it. 1. spend 10 thousand dollars and 6 months going to school through PIMA. 2. Go to a 3 quarter night program through Renton Technical College. 3. Train on the job. I'd like to do # 2 and 3. But the timing must be right. I'm fearful of not being successful with my life, with always trying to make it, to finally get somewhere, of being stuck in this going no where life. Being a wife and mother you know where you are and what your job is and you keep doing it. Marriage is one answer to that fear.

I also realized that I need VALIDATION. Sometimes I have these failure dreams, about random things, but I know what the message is; others being better and me failing. When a person is continually left behind, not chosen and does not have a career, but a job, life doesn't look so promising. A man gives you validation for a weekend and then doesn't call and I feel worthless. Not just because of him, but because of everything that I've blogged reciently. I know that's not healthy, that I should have my own self confidence regardless of what happens in my life and relying on somone else is not heathly for that either. So, what is a girl to do, besides hang on and get through until she gets back up and feels ok again? There you go. I think that's it, but you never know, I may get more insight into this period of my life.

Oh- one more thing. I'm not thinking eternally, but just earth life and with fear and not faith.
Heavenly Father has said to me in a blessing:

I will not let you fail in any way, as long as you continue to work diligently
to live the commandments, to do the things you have been placed here to do.

Success is relative.

I realized

I realized today when driving the dogs that just because Abraham and Sarah had received the promises and believed that God was able to fulfill his promises and raise up the dead, it was still hard. It was still a trial and there was probably still crying and prayers. I was thinking those scriptures would stop that.

My coping method is to create stories in my head, stories of having a boy friend, etc. I don't like it. I only do it when I'm in these times. I wonder if Sarah did the same thing? Did she imagine herself pregnant, giving birth, with a baby, a little boy and a man that is a son and an heir to the promises. Maybe it's not such a bad thing after all. When I get a chance to talk with her in the next life, this is what I will ask.

My Favorite Faith Scriptures

The last 2 months have been very difficult. I've cried a lot. I've been in this flat effect depression daily, hourly and nearly every minute. I've already had 2 blessings and plan on getting another. I've tried at times to ground myself in truth; in what is and not what might be, but I've struggled with not being married in a way I haven't in the last 3 years. Believe it or not I have 15 promises of marriage and a family. They are all written down. But there are moments when I want to give up, to loose faith, and to forget it all.

I recently taught seminary 4 days. I was blessed to teach Hebrews 11-13, some of my favorite New Testament scripture generally and my favorite scripture specifically about faith. I taught the juniors and seniors. I broke them up into groups of 3 and gave them a few verses and had them write every example of faith, each one on a sheet of paper. Here are a few examples:

1. Through faith we understand that the worlds were ^aframed by the ^bword of God
2. By faith ^aAbel offered unto God a more excellent ^bsacrifice than Cain,
3. By faith ^aEnoch was ^btranslated that he should not see death (verses 3-5 not in full)

We built a 'wall of faith'. The goal of course is not have have our personal walls of faith broken down by the enemy or penetrated by doubt, fear, or any other tactic of Satan. As one idea says we should present evidences to our mind that we become unshaken. I taught this lesson before my 'difficult time'. I told the kids about my blessings and about my lack of dates. But I also told them that I believed them, that I trust the Lord.

I think one of the main reasons I'm struggling so, is because so many single friends are getting married or have gotten married. I've been to 3 sealings already. There are more to come and some I won't be invited to, but they are none-the-less happening. I'm happy for them, really I am. I know they have waited a long time too, I just don't understand why it's not me. I feel as if this summer and perhaps on will be a trial of my faith. It's a trial I wish I didn't have to go through, but that I want to pass. I'm attending the temple weekly per normal and praying in tears for blessings. But I still wait. To help with this waiting I've created a list of scriptures that I will put in my purse and post on my wall to keep my faith strong like those of ancient times. I don't want to waver for fear my desires will not be fulfilled. You can see by what I've underlined what is important to me. I'm hoping this will get me through. Here is the list:

Through faith also Sara herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she judged him faithful who had promised. Hebrews 11:11

By faith Abraham, when he was tried offered up Isaac: and he that had received the promises offered up his only begotten son, Hebrews 11:17

Accounting that God was able to raise him up, even from the dead; from whence also he received him in a figure. Hebrews 11:19

These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth. Hebrews 11: 13

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross; Hebrews 12: 1-2

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11

The eyes of all wait upon thee; and thou givest them their meat in due season. Thou openest thine hand, and satisfiest the desire of every living thing. ....He will fulfill the desire of them that fear him. Psalm 145: 15-16,19

Our Secret Garden's

Both abundance and lack of abundance exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend . . . when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present—love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature, and personal pursuits that bring us happiness—the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience heaven on earth.

Sarah Ban Breathnach

Inside I still knew I was a lady

Remember this post? The beauty every day didn't happen, as I knew it wouldn't. But I read this in the June Ensign. The talk is called Our Refined Heavenly Home. Douglas L. Callister said this:

What I have shared about bringing great language, literature, and music into the home may be said with equal truth of great art—perhaps tastefully displayed in our heavenly home. It may also be said of our physical appearance and manners, the order of our homes, how we offer our prayers, and how we read God’s word.

I once visited briefly with the great actress Audrey Hepburn while she was making the movie My Fair Lady. She spoke of the opening scene in the movie in which she depicted a modest, unpolished flower girl. Her face had been besmirched with charcoal to make her seem part of her surroundings. “But,” she said with a twinkle in her eye, “I was wearing my perfume. Inside I still knew I was a lady.” It doesn’t take expensive perfume to make a lady, but it does require cleanliness, modesty, self-respect, and pride in one’s appearance.

Many years ago an associate of mine decided he would please his wife by sharing with her a specific compliment each night as he arrived home. One night he praised her cooking. A second night he thanked her for excellence in housekeeping. A third night he acknowledged her fine influence on the children. The fourth night, before he could speak, she said, “I know what you are doing. I thank you for it. But don’t say any of those things. Just tell me you think I am beautiful.”

She expressed an important need she had. Women ought to be praised for all the gifts they possess—including their attentiveness to their personal appearance—that so unselfishly add to the richness of the lives of others. We must not let ourselves go and become so casual—even sloppy—in our appearance that we distance ourselves from the beauty heaven has given us.

But this is what really got to me: "It is vulgar to wear dirty linen when one is not engaged in dirty work". So, I'm going to put forth effort to do my makeup every day. I've been curling it more. Now it's time for the next step.

Infertility and Adoption

An Expected End

Last night I was reading part of section 88. It's a long one with a lot of good stuff and so I'm taking it slow. It has a parable in it. I didn't remember that. It's not a parable that is discussed much, but it goes like this:

51 Behold, I will liken these kingdoms unto a man having a field, and he sent forth his servants into the field to dig in the field.

52 And he said unto the first: Go ye and labor in the field, and in the first hour I will come unto you, and ye shall behold the joy of my countenance.

53 And he said unto the second: Go ye also into the field, and in the second hour I will visit you with the joy of my countenance.

54 And also unto the third, saying: I will visit you;

55 And unto the fourth, and so on unto the twelfth.

56 And the lord of the field went unto the first in the first hour, and tarried with him all that hour, and he was made glad with the light of the countenance of his lord.

57 And then he withdrew from the first that he might visit the second also, and the third, and the fourth, and so on unto the twelfth.

58 And thus they all received the light of the countenance of their lord, every man in his hour, and in his time, and in his season—

59 Beginning at the first, and so on unto the ^alast, and from the last unto the first, and from the first unto the last;

60 Every man in his own ^aorder, until his hour was finished, even according as his lord had commanded him, that his lord might be glorified in him, and he in his lord, that they all might be glorified.

The Lord tells those early saints that he is likening them to the kingdom's and inhabitants, to go and ponder upon these things, and to pray unto him while he is near. No keys of understanding are given. It's a strange parable. All I could think the message was is that He comes to everyone, but maybe I was one of the last he would come to. Meaning of course that my desires and wishes would happen, just much latter in the day. As parables have many layers, this maybe what it means for me, but I got out my institute manual and looked it up. It's actually about all the worlds the Lord has created. He goes to one earth, then another and so on. He will come to ours for about 1000 years and then move on to the next. Wow, what a great testimony that he does make more worlds.

My stake president is always telling us to search the scriptures, to feast upon them. That you can't do that at night in bed. That he has yet to take a Thanksgiving dinner to bed, but I have always read my scriptures at night on my bed and I do feast. My 2 sticks are laid out, along with my packet of colored pencils, and a book or two. I usually end up studying for an hour or so and it is study. I often have to make myself stop or I'll stay up too late. Section 88 also has a verse about "seeking Him early"(83). I often wonder if that is not always about the morning, but about our lives. Seek him when you are young, seek him as soon a possible. I did some cross referencing. Deut 4:29-31 and Jer 29:13(10-14) were my favorites of the 4 total. Of course I always read more than the verses suggested. It's easy to do that for me as I love the Old Testament.

Deut 4: 29-31: 29 But if from thence thou shalt ^aseek the Lord thy God, thou shalt ^bfind him, if thou seek him with all thy heart and with all thy soul.

30 When thou art in ^atribulation, and all these things are come upon thee, even in the ^blatter days, if thou ^cturn to the Lord thy God, and shalt be obedient unto his voice;

31 (For the Lord thy God is a ^amerciful God;) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, nor forget the ^bcovenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them.

Love that. Love the verses before and following it. He is a merciful God who helps in times of tribulation to those who are obedient. He does not forget his covenant!

Jer 29: 11 : For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected ^aend.

"an expected end." He's going to give us our expected end, weather is the second hour or the 12th. We will get what we want. Although we are so less than he is, so disobedient, so full of the world, so full of the natural man, He doesn't think evil of us. He has thoughts of peace for us. That is so comforting to hear, when I'm in a yucky place. When I feel forgotten. I guess those verses about his qualitites and attributes are suppose to give us confidence in going to him, early or late as the case may be. I find it hard at times to pray to him. I'm feel like I'm begging and for the same things as I begged for for the last 15 years. It seems like It doesn't matter, that his plan for me will take place no matter how hard things are now. Maybe I should just pray for peace, for comfort, for understanding.

Finding Happiness

This last month has been hard in the happiness realm of my life. It's summer and the sun is out and that should help, but it's not. I hope it gets better.

I've decided

Last night I was reading sec 78. Great chapter, telling us about God's plan for Zion, his qualities and that he has and that he will come through on his promises. Lots of good stuff in there that taught me so much.

Verse 15:That you may come up unto the ^acrown prepared for you, and be made ^brulers over many kingdoms, saith the Lord God, the Holy One of Zion, who hath established the foundations of ^cAdam-ondi-Ahman;

What stood out was the "many kingdoms". Plural- not just one. I cross referenced it which led to Revelations 20: 6. I almost read that whole chapter. Ch 20 is about the Millennium. Satan will be loosed after the 1000 years and shall go forth to deceive the nations (v8). I don't want to be one of those that are deceived. Can you imagine being righteous during those years, doing temple work, having peace and then you don't believe it, being led astray. Sounds terrible to me. Even the very elect will be deceived.

Isa. 45: 4 Israel mine elect, I have even called thee. Matt. 24: 24 (Mark 13: 22; JS-M 1: 22) they shall deceive the very elect.

So what I've decided is I want to die before the melinium. I'll just keep being righteous my whole life and help from the other side. No chances of being deceived. I think it's a good plan!

Last Sunday we sung hymn 137 "Testimony" I love the words to the last verse. It's really true.

As testimony fills my heart, It dulls the pain of days.

For one brief moment, heaven's view Appears before my gaze.

By Loren C. Dunn.

Mothers that are not yet

“To those who are barren and unable to bear offspring, our deepest sympathy is extended. Let us quote for the consolation of those who are not blessed with the procreative power a statement from the Prophet Brigham Young: ‘Let me here say a word to console the feelings and hearts of all who belong to this Church. Many of the sisters grieve because they are not blessed with offspring. You will see the time when you will have millions of children around you. If you are faithful to your covenants, you will be mothers of nations. You will become Eves to earths like this, and when you have assisted in peopling one earth, there are millions of others still in the course of creation. And when they have endured a thousand million times longer than this earth, it is only as it were at the beginning of your creation. Be faithful and if you are not blessed with children in this time, you will be hereafter.’ "
(Deseret News, Vol. 10, p. 306, October 14, 1860.) (Spencer W. Kimball, fireside address delivered in San Antonio, Texas, 3 Dec. 1977, 24–26).

Reflections of Christ

My Furry Family is Bigger

A rat in Justin's shirt.

Hanging out in the food box- we were that small!

Little baby furry on Justin's shoulder. Doesn't he look so sweet?

Heather with them both.

Eating macaroni and cheese. I fed them so much they pooped 20 pellets. Never again.
Don't you just love their little hands? They are like little people!

Checking out what's going on out there. They are very curious and are always wondering what is up and want to be out with the people.

Escaping to the real world.

The first Friday of April, I got 2 baby male rats. I've never had baby rats before and they were so tiny at a month old they both fit into my hand. A month later they are much bigger. I got them for free and their names are Spotty and Sniffer. They of course love to crawl into my clothes and leave little red scratches on my shoulders. We all like them. Coco wants to eat them! Parker seems to be doing ok with them as he's seen those kind of furries before. I've been bringing them over to McOmbers for Justin and Heather to play with too.

A Van with a Plan

I got a new van today. It's for my dog walking business. Here's the down low: 2002 Chevy with 94,160 miles. Cost me $4200. I have a 48 month loan on it with a 5.49 interest rate. I haven't paid a penny on it yet and won't until June 10th. Weird that it's in my possession and that I drove it today. I'm keeping my Corolla for the good gas mileage, and have seriously lowered my insurance. Here 's the beaut!

Smart Woman

Stupidity in a woman is unfeminine.

Friedrich Nietzsche
Human, All Too Human, 1878

The guy is a atheist, but realized that if you loose Christianity, you loose the ideas too.

From ME

I was giving someone I don't know advice on their blog and I said this to them.

"Never feel bad about doing something
that makes you a better person!"

I realized as I was typing that I need to take my own advice.

Faith Like Potatoes

This is a great movie with great acting. It's based on a true story that happened in South Africa. Lots of biblical comparisons. It's a good way to spend 2 hours. I encourage you to see it.

I Have to Share

Not enough people know about this video. Now you do!

Days of Salvation

Passover Thursday, Atonement Friday, Resurrection Sunday

NEW/OLD Post #2

Scroll down to March 31st to see
who I am
and take a quiz to find out about you!

Fish: Yesterday and Today.

Gregory had a melt down today. I took Justin, Heather and Gregory to the park. G did not want to go, but walked the path and sat under a tree for a few minutes. He started walking back to the car so I had to follow, leaving the other 2 at the play ground. He didn't want to just sit in the car, he wanted to drive away. I had to walk back to J and H to let them know and make a plan. Heather came back with me and got in the front seat. G was laying in the back seat crying and hitting his head. We got the car moving and he was still upset, opened the car door once, pushed my arm with his foot and then started to really kick Heather. She started to crouch down as far as she could to protect herself, but she got a big push just as we got home. This one hurt, but she ran our the door crying and into the house and moved the rat cage. She knows about these episodes and knew she needed to get them to safety. I didn't realize what she was doing. She needed a hug and some comforting. She absolutely did the right thing and I'm so glad she did. I headed up the stairs and it was wet. Why? I looked around and the fish bowl we'd only had for a few weeks was empty on the stairs! Where were the fish? Maybe there was time to save them. I looked around and found one on the marble floor looking like it was too late. I grabbed him anyway and ran him to the other fish bowl. He was OK. I yelled to Heather and she looked for the other one. He was on the stairs. She grabbed him and did the same thing. Another fish life was saved! 4 little lives were saved. Heather is a brave girl!

When I was looking for that fish I had a flash back to year 2 at Ricks. I kept fish in the blender my mom got for a wedding present. I used that for the first semester. On the buttons I put a sign that said: And you think you have stress in your life! We re-arranged our living room around quite a bit. The fish blender stood with the other electronics in the living room and one time when moving things around and plugging things in, the blender, not normally plugged in, got plugged in with out us knowing it. Our FHE brothers came in and one of them pushed the puree button and WIZZZZZZZZZ. There was no lid on, and the water became fish soup and we found one fish eye on the table. Of course 6 female voices screamed! He was for the rest of the year branded "the fish murder".
At Christmas time I got a globe fish tank. It was round and had the continents on it. The little fish could swim in their little world. This one came with air filter and such, so I could go up with quality of fish. I got a few different ones, but one of them was picking on the other and stredding his beautiful fins. I decided I needed to take the bad guy back to the pet store. I came home for lunch, put him in a clear picture of water. I had one class and then after that I'd take him back. I'd only be gone an hour. When I came back the picture was gone! Where was he? Where was the fish? I joked about it and looked in silly places like under the couch. Mandy one of my 5 roommates came home and I was telling her about it. She was the culprit this time. She saw this picture of water in the sink and didn't know why it was there, so just dumped it out. She didn't see the yellow fish. I reached in to the disposal and pulled him out. He didn't float! I guess it serves him right, the little bully!

FISH ARE FRIENDS!